"Gosh darn, Tim, Eh, I mean JasonMaslanka@aol.com, you really captured the essence of Jason Maslanka in that email. It was the wonderful misspelling of "their" that really convinced everyone it was me."
-Jason Maslanka, on being impersonated, Pappy 2001

"I agree that no matter what you think of Amanda, you have to appreciate her ability to openly discuss her feelings. You can call her temperamental,but I think she's for real and that's cool. She's the kind of girl that needs to go to www.jesus.com and get herself a Jesus credit card." -Webmaster of www.jesus.com, Pappy 2001

"Pappyball has become an icon. He (or she) is pretty much what Prospect High School means to me."
-Jason Maslanka, Pappy 2001

"You have gone from being immature, obscene and stupid to just plain bigoted and mean. This is the fine education you are receiving at UIC? You ought to be ashamed. I am sad for you and your embittered little life."
-Ms Mackie, English faculty member at Buffalo Grove High School, to Jason Maslanka,
Pappy 2001

"I would urge everyone to do a few things. Primarily, honestly take
note of people's real problems with this list. I removed a certain District
214 teacher from this list because I know that she has taken serious
issue with this in the past."
-Jason Maslanka, Pappy 2002

"I make $88,000 per year. So who's laughing now, idiot?"
-Pete Majer Impersonator, Pappy 2001

"I dont really have anything to say except that anyone has my open invitation to try to impersonate me and send out an email "from me" maybe from bridgetobrien@aol.com or a screenname of the like. i want to see how well you do on getting my quirks down."
-Bridget O'Brien, Pappy 2001

"I can honestly say that I've been reading every message because they are so hilarious and I personally love to look at gay porn and touch myself in perverse ways while looking at those hunky men."
-Wes Klimczak, Pappy 1999

"I just hope that one of these days, Pappyball will reveal himself (or
herself) so we can all breath a sigh of relief. Now that will be a
great day."
-Jason Maslanka, Pappy 2001

"I hope you burn in hell."
- Tom Schoenbeck, to Jason Maslanka, Pappy 2001

"Find another forum for your immature, harassing email exchanges."
-Monica Maciaz, to Tim Matta, Pappyball 2001

"Damn I really die for these emails, holy shit."
-the real Amanda Grish, Pappy 1999

"I just wanted to comment on how cool I think the person who wrote an email "from Amanda Grish" and sent it to everyone is. Seriously, you are the coolest. You are fucking twenty years old, get a life."
-Amanda Grish, after being impersonated, Pappy 1999

"I mean the search for Pappyball is ridiculous because we are bringing out stuff on what Pete said about Jill and why Jason is a complete loser...Like we need more evidence on how big a loser Jason is."
-Pat Small, Pappy 1999

"Although Jason is the biggest loser in the world, he isn't Pappyball.... he doesn't have the mental capacity, nor the creativity to make pudding, yet come up with something that could have lasted this long.... so we can all accept that he is a complete loser, and maybe even feel sorry for him... sorry that he has to wake up everyday to the realization that he is still jason."
-Pat Small, Pappy 2002

"BLOW IT OUT YOUR ASS"
-Andrea Getty Impersonator, Pappy 1999

"If anyone else blows anything out of there ass can I have it for mine?"
-Chris Rudnick, Pappy 1999, in response

"Miles and Matta are sneaky little bastards who quite possibly like to take it up the backdoor from each other."
-Doyle Brunson, Pappy 2001

"Mike and Tim... keep the lame screen names to a minimum."
-Pat Small, Pappy 2002

"I hope those who have had their names unfairly tarnished by people who don't even have their own shit straight (Amanda) are as pleased with this as I am."
-Tim Matta, Pappy 1999

"I strongly urge each and every one of you to not let anything related to this Pappyball business get in the way of your salvation to god."
-Anthony Hatfield, Pappy 2002

"Tom, after you get fired I recommend you become a journalist due to your bizarre interest in going to any length just to have a story-- a story to tell to other people who don't care."
-Mike Miles, Pappy 2002

"Over the years, it (Pappyball) has been different people, and even today, I am sure there are multiple people involved. I don't think that even those who started it know who those in the middle were, or those of today. It is perfection."
-Jason Maslanka, Pappy 2001

"Me and tom did make out at a party."
-Pat Small, Pappy 2002

"This PappyBall thing has gotten me thinking"
-Dan Randolph, Pappy 1999

"I am not pappyball, I never was pappyball, and I never will be pappyball. I am phisheats and I am Tom."
- TT Stans, Pappy 1999

"I would also like to say that despite what you think I have at no time had the name pappyball. I have never ever been him, and probably never will."
-Jason Maslanka, the final email of Pappy 1999

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